Not all communities were meant to last forever—and that's perfectly fine.
I talked about this with Sarah Agopian-Khalifé, a community builder and experience designer (coming to the podcast!). She mentioned how some communities are seasonal, and it got me thinking about something I know intimately: building community when you know you're leaving.
When we lived in Tanzania, we had this incredible community on a hill. BBQs in our back yard, weekly activities at our local coffee shop, Aunties who would stop by just to say hello. It felt permanent, until it wasn't. Moving to the US meant that daily closeness would shift to text check-ins and annual visits.
Temporary and permanent communities need fundamentally different design approaches. High school communities create urgency because graduation is circled on everyone's calendar. Church communities are built for decades of slow growth and weathering storms together.
If I'd known our Tanzania community would be temporary, I might have:
Said yes to more random invitations instead of waiting for "next time." Temporary groups need "swift trust" built through shared action rather than gradual disclosure.
Started a virtual book club earlier. Having a collection of the group's favorite things in one place is a good way to plan for "institutionalized termination"; preserving what you build.
Planned a proper goodbye celebration instead of awkward "see you soon" hugs. Research shows ending ceremonies are as important as beginnings for processing shared experiences.
Mobile populations naturally maintain "multi-local community ties" rather than single-place attachments. It was Leah Justina Anyanwu who explained how we don't have to choose between our international relationships and our current geography; we can design for both.
The constraint of time makes us love harder, faster, more intentionally. Sometimes temporary groups achieve deeper collaboration and insight precisely because everyone knows the clock is ticking.
When we accept temporariness upfront, we might discover that finite doesn't mean less meaningful.
